Wit & Wisdom

Post by **noreply66** » Fri Dec 01, 2006 8:06 am

Drunkenness is temporary suicide: The happiness that it brings is merely negative,a momentary cessation of unhappiness.

Bertrand Russell,quoted in new Scientist

BubbleGumTiger · Post by **BubbleGumTiger** » Fri Dec 01, 2006 12:12 pm

Sponges are Female, because they're soft, squeezable and retain water.

BubbleGumTiger · Post by **BubbleGumTiger** » Sat Dec 02, 2006 8:00 am

A Web Page is Female, because it's always getting hit on.......

Post by **noreply66** » Sat Dec 02, 2006 8:10 am

^^^^

Life is a foreign language.All men mispronounce it.

Novelist Christopher Morley quoted in Forbes

BubbleGumTiger · Post by **BubbleGumTiger** » Sun Dec 03, 2006 7:35 am

A Subway is Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

Post by **noreply66** » Sun Dec 03, 2006 7:56 am

Men are more apt to be mistaken in their generalizations than in their particular observations.

Nicolo Machiavelli,quoted in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

BubbleGumTiger · Post by **BubbleGumTiger** » Sun Dec 03, 2006 2:38 pm

An Hourglass is Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.

BubbleGumTiger · Post by **BubbleGumTiger** » Mon Dec 04, 2006 7:45 am

A Hammer is Male , because it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.

Post by **noreply66** » Mon Dec 04, 2006 8:31 am

Foregive your enemies,but never forget their names.

John F.Kennedy,quoted in the Morristown N.J.,Daily Record

Focused · Post by **Focused** » Mon Dec 04, 2006 8:42 pm

The perfect Christmas gift for the person who has everything is a burglar alarm.

BubbleGumTiger · Post by **BubbleGumTiger** » Tue Dec 05, 2006 5:28 am

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather--who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

Post by **noreply66** » Tue Dec 05, 2006 8:10 am

I can't listen to that much Wagner;I started getting the urge to conquer Poland.

Woody Allen,quoted in The New Yor Times

Post by **noreply66** » Wed Dec 06, 2006 7:54 am

There is no duty we so much underrate as the duty of being happy.

Robert Louis Stevenson,quoted in the Fort Collins Coloradoan

BubbleGumTiger · Post by **BubbleGumTiger** » Wed Dec 06, 2006 8:01 am

Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.

Focused · Post by **Focused** » Wed Dec 06, 2006 4:27 pm

You can get by on charm for about 15 minutes.. After that, you'd better know something.

Post by **noreply66** » Thu Dec 07, 2006 7:57 am

Love conquers everything except poverty and toohache.

Mae West,quoted in the Irish Times

Post by **noreply66** » Fri Dec 08, 2006 7:56 am

All human knowledge is precious whether or not it serves the slightest human use.

Poet A. E. Houseman,quoted in The New York Times.

BubbleGumTiger · Post by **BubbleGumTiger** » Fri Dec 08, 2006 8:12 am

In a poll taken a few years ago, women were asked if they would sleep with Bill Clinton? 84% responded " Never Again".

Post by **noreply66** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 8:21 am

^^^^^

Prosperity is only an instrument to be used,not a deity to be worshipped.

Calvin Coolidge,quoted in Salon.com

BubbleGumTiger · Post by **BubbleGumTiger** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 8:47 am

Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.